So far Megan Fox is a lot more interesting off-screen than in the movies. She ain’t much of an actress, but boy she says some wiggy shit on the publicity circuit. Plus she has some of the world’s worst tattoos. That Marilyn thing on her arm? Good God. There are few things more entertaining than an actress who thinks she invented cool but is trying way too hard.
In “Jennifer’s Body,” Fox is far too mature-looking to be playing a high school vixen, but she sinks her teeth into the vampy, campy title role. This movie is “Heathers” meets “Mean Girls” with a heavy dose of monster-movie gore. It’s not as scary as it should be. But I found myself enjoying the ride, thanks in no small part to the smart if overly self-conscious screenplay from Diablo Cody, who of course won the Oscar for penning “Juno.”
Amanda Seyfried, wearing glasses and unflattering hairstyles to conceal her own hotness, plays Jennifer’s worshipful best friend, Needy. Because she’s, well, Needy. The madness kicks in when Jennifer and Needy check out a big-city band playing their local rock hall. (The lead singer is played by Adam Brody from “The O.C.” Nice work here. He makes us want to slap him.) These guys are punks. Not punk rockers, just snotty little punks with a serious team evil streak. They’re willing to literally sacrifice another human being to make it big.
As the venue literally goes down in flames, a seemingly tranced-out Jennifer takes off with the band—and the next time we see her, she’s spitting up foul black liquid and acting like a woman possessed. She’s now Satan’s daughter, or something like that. All I can say is that all the True Blood in the world isn’t going to satisfy this girl’s appetite. She’s a Maneater, watch out boys here she comes…
There’s some great pop culture satire here, as when the aforementioned band releases an opportunistic tribute song to the teens killed in the fire. It sounds just like one of those treacly ballads composed in the wake of a tragedy. And the classroom exchanges are hilarious, with J.K. Simmons as a one-handed teacher who tries to connect with the kids as they snipe at one another.
I also liked the dynamic between Needy and Jennifer. Even as Needy begins to suspect her best friend is a bloodsucking freakshow, she’s still attracted to her and wants to be as cool as her. (The Fox/Seyfried kiss isn’t as juicy as Gellar/Blair in “Cruel Intentions” or Richards/Campbell in “Wild Things,” but it’s a good one.) Only when Needy’s boyfriend is in jeopardy does the girl spring into action.
Once again, all of Diablo’s characters have the ability to toss off articulate, cutting-edge, sometimes too clever commentaries. At times it’s amusing as hell; occasionally it becomes grating. Still, the woman can write. Compared to the mindless dialogue in the “Final Destination” movies, I’ll take the snappy banter of “Jennifer’s Body” any time.
And at least nobody’s falling in love with a brooding hunk of an eyeliner-wearing vampire in this movie. Come to think of it, I’d like to see Jennifer get transferred to that “Twilight” high school and shake things up.